Conquering a childhood foe

[primsong]

One of the things I swore I would never do to my kids when I had a family was to force them to consume something that they really didn't want to consume (beyond the "one bite so you know if you actually like it or not" level). This is in large part because when I was in grade school and didn't like tomatoes, my father decided that I would not only drink some V-8 (tomato-veggie juice), but that I would drink an entire tall glass of it. I could not leave the table until I did.

Three hours later, I was still sitting at the table in the waning light, crying because I couldn't gag down the glass of juice. My mother (bless her heart! bless her with a thousand blessings!) took pity on me and waited until my dad was distracted with working on something outside to come by and chug the glass of tomato juice for me then let me go.

Fast-forward 35 years. Tomatoes and I are good friends, I grow them, eat them, cook with them. But the smell or taste or even the *thought* of tomato juice in a glass makes me gag, thanks to old emotional baggage.

This is stupid, thought I. My dad isn't even alive anymore and here I am reacting to his poor parenting. I am sick and tired of this old event having this hold on me! SO - I bought a big jug of V-8 and drank it.

Slowly. Recoiling and gagging over the first teensy dollops, wincing over the small juice glasses of it and forcing it down like medicine. I finally managing to empty the entire thing. Okay, I can do this, I thought - and I bought another and did it again.

By the end of the third jug, I could drink it without gagging! Freeedoooom! I still don't find it my favorite flavor and have to have something after to erase the taste, but I can do it! I took a big swig of the stuff right from the jug this morning just because I COULD.

Ah. That's better. V-8 and I are reconciled at last. Go forth and do likewise.

Comments

[itcomesinpints]

Yes! Tomato juice can't bring you down! That has to be incredibly invigorating, to defeat and overcome childhood baggage (which is the worst kind of baggage and keeps therapists employed through any economy). I had the same issues with baked beans after my Dad forced me to eat it as a child. Just this past year, I voluntarily tried some from a branch my friend made, and though it was definitely the delicious sauce she used, I loved them. Now I'm open to baked beans, which is huge, but I still have to fight a gag sometimes.

I think it's simply part of growing up, and our tastes evolving. I agree, I think everyone should try this, because in sure everyone has that *one* food or drink item they need to overcome.

On another note: way to go, dads.

[primsong]

Dads do have a tendency to be more clueless than Moms, sadly. :-P Is it a control thing? I dunno.

Very glad you have been reconciled the land of the Baked Bean - here's to opening up the doors the parental figures inadvertently slammed!

[senmut]

That kind of parenting is the kind I tried to avoid, yes.

[primsong]

Being a parent myself really helped me unplug a lot of old junk, simply because I had the other view of it and finally understood the "why" behind what parents do sometimes, but there's always those few Red Buttons that escape and have to be tracked down with a more focused effort. Now I can only hope my own won't need too much counseling, it's a hard thing to do.

[primsong]

I love those boxed soups, they're very tasty - hoorah for discovering your old edible-enemy could be a friend instead.

[telegramsam]

Yea, that was pretty damned mean. My grandmother was kind of like that when I was growing up too - everything was a some kind of head-game power struggle with her. She'd force me to do things just to prove she could.

So yea, sucks to that!

I love fresh tomatoes and I love spaghetti sauce (on spaghetti, or pizza or some other appropriate foodstuffs) but I *hate* tomato juice and tomato soup. So I am impressed you managed to drink that stuff. EW EW EW.

[primsong]

In his case, he was mostly just self-centered and oblivious to the idea that other people wouldn't like the things he liked - it's quite probable he'd completely forgotten he'd told me to do that by the time my mom rescued me. Which is kind of haunting in its own way, because now I wonder what horrible damage I may have inflicted on my kids without even remembering that I did... hopefully not much, an nothing too lasting...

And yeah, tomato juice is never going to make its way into any kind of top-ten list for me (or top-fifty, for that matter) but at least it's now in the 'edible' category instead of the 'get awaaaaay!' category.

[telegramsam]

What, "IMMA MAAAAKE U LIKE IT!!" ????

That doesn't even make sense.

I dunno, my parents expected me and my brother to eat what was served, but for things we didn't like we were only required to eat two bites and leave it. If we went hungry though, we went hungry. My mother wasn't one of those indulgent types who would make a separate meal for the children than what the adults ate, which I know is more common these days.

I think there's a "happy medium" in there somewhere. I have plenty of childhood experiences I'd rather forget but I don't think food is really a major subject in that category...

[kerravonsen]

Go you!

[primsong]

Thank you!

[redwolf]

Your tastes change. Try eating some of the stuff you loved as a kid and you'll barf now.

I do not like the forced eating thing. I used to get it on cooked green beans. I don't know why, but they make me throw up. I love them raw and steamed is fine, but not cooked. Still don't. Still not seeing what an adult gets out of forcing a child to eat something that will result in vomit.

It wasn't forced on me and I probably would have eaten it if it was sliced up, but I had an aunt who loved tongue. Being presented with an intact tongue as a kid is a bit much. Same aunt had a thing for sardine sandwiches and I love those.

Good to hear you got past your father's baggage.

[florentinescot]

points to button. :-D

[elij_0650]

A little shot of vodka, a splash of tabasco sauce and a bit of freshly ground black pepper. MMMMMM!